The Mold You Choose

My 9-year-old daughter has been asking if she can watch a certain (seemingly harmless and quite common) TV show. We don't have cable or satellite, or even an antennae for that matter, but we do have Netflix and they offer the first season of this particular show as one of their choices. Now, I'm a firm believer that what you put into your mind will eventually come out in your actions, so we try to be very careful what we let our kids watch and listen to. I didn't know much about this show, other than it seemed age-appropriate for my pre-adolescent (or at least it was marketed that way), but decided rather than just telling her "no you can't watch it", the time had come for me to start making a diligent effort to teach my daughter how to evaluate the things she allows into her mind. So we picked an episode and decided we would watch it together, carefully, evaluating the show in the areas of modesty/purity, personal responsibility (taking responsibility for your own actions), respect for authority, treating peers with respect, and if the characters acted in a way that would please God, or not. Neither one of us knew what we might discover, good or bad, but decided we would keep track of both the bad and the good points of the show.

Wow.

The good points? Well, seriously the only good thing was the characters were not immodest, at least in this one episode. I've seen promotional images for this show, and can't exactly say those are the ideal in the area of modesty, but at least this episode posed no problems in that area. That one area. And that's pretty much the extent of the "good" list. And I was even looking for good areas.

The bad? Probably the worst issue was in the area of respect for authority. The show portrays authority figures as idiots who don't need to be respected or listened to, but are disrespected at every turn. Two examples: one of the characters throws a football and hits a teacher in the face (and of course the entire crowd of kids laugh because it is the "disliked" teacher.) Another character grabs the principal's cell phone while he is talking on it, and throws it onto the floor in hopes of breaking it, all in an effort to GET detention. (Yes, you read that right--to GET detention.) Students are disrespecting the authority of their teachers, and teachers are disrespecting the authority of their Principal. Nice.

Continuing with the "bad" list, we witnessed lying, cheating, bullying of other students, a teacher saying he hated his wife (and the students), a girl fighting her conscience (meaning she was trying to FORCE herself to do the wrong thing--pull the fire alarm), and constant "sneaking around" to get done what they wanted to get done. Wholesome.

But probably the biggest red flag of the whole show is the attitude that all of the above is...funny.

Lying? Funny. Bullying? Funny. Hearing a guy say he hates his wife? Funny. Disrespect? Really funny.

Now I know you're thinking I must have watched something like Bart Simpson or South Park, right? Nope--we watched iCarly. Surprised? Maybe. But before you write me off and tell yourself, "Oh, it isn't that bad...." take some time to watch it and really evaluate the subtle themes and messages of the show.

I'd  be willing to admit we may have gotten a particularly bad episode, but not out of the ballpark. I doubt I'll watch another just to find out.

Sometimes we forget that the things we watch, listen to, or read actually mold our thinking and our actions. Is iCarly the mold I want my children or myself to come out of? Are there no other choices??

Well....we evaluated another show right after iCarly--Little House on the Prairie. Talk about contrast. In the episode we watched, it was Christmastime and every member of the Ingalls family personally sacrificed for someone else in the family.  Mary worked 3 weeks on a shirt for her Pa. Charles slaved away on a difficult project just to make enough money to buy Caroline her present. Laura traded her dearly loved horse with Mr. Olson for a stove for Caroline. And when Pa gave Laura a saddle, she cried. But not because she no longer had the horse to use it on, but because she felt bad her Pa had went to such work for her. SelfLESSness. Now that's the kind of theme I want my kids to absorb.

So you've probably guessed what my kids will be watching at our house. And what your kids watch at yours is completely up to you. Just be informed. Pay attention. Don't assume anything, good or bad. Evaluate for yourself. Please. This is important stuff.